“To lose confidence in ones body, is to lose confidence in oneself” ~ Simone de Beauvoir
It is a fact – we women come in all shapes, heights and sizes. But, as we get older hormonal changes may present us with excess weight, especially around the tummy area and a changed body shape. Other transformations occur – thinning, greying hair, drier skin, declining vision, stiffening limbs, wrinkly skin and so forth.
Dealing with stressful situations such as loss of parents, children leaving home, or being made redundant can also take their toll on how we look and feel. Therefore, it can be hard to feel good about our bodies and our own self-image.
Learn to love what you see in the mirror
Ok, here is a little exercise to try out. Stand in front of a full length mirror (fully clothed or naked, it is up to you). Are you happy with what you see?
Yes, I know it is easier said than done, especially when your eyes keep being drawn downwards to your no longer pert boobies, your sagging stretched marked tummy or cellulite ravaged thighs.
Please, do learn to love what you see in the mirror. This is far from being an overnight achievement, and really, if it is any consolation, celebrities and actors have parts of their bodies they too feel insecure about (I do – and no, I’m not a celebrity……yet). You can learn to love what you see in the mirror by accentuating the positive. What you are actually doing here is shifting the focus away from what you don’t like, or feel uncomfortable about, to focusing on what you do like about your self.
Go back and stand in front of that mirror. Take a deep breath and put a smile on your face. Starting from the top, slowly work downwards. Look at your face and body again and this time, concentrate on the parts you do like. Your warm and friendly smile perhaps, shapely legs, curvaceous figure, tiny waist, slender wrists, or your ‘Jennifer Lopez’ booty.
You sexy thing
“I believe in miracles, where’re you from, you sexy thing” ~ Hot Chocolate
How old are you? 42?, 54?, 68 or 75? I believe in miracles and I am sure you do too, but let’s be real here, it is highly unlikely you will ever again look and feel as you did when you were 18 or even 25. So…..no, don’t go comparing yourself and feeling inadequate against the likes of Rihanna, Pixie Lott, Beyonce, Lady Gaga or even any of the photoshopped, airbrushed models you see in beauty/fashion magazines. Embrace your age – we have enough amazing looking role models of our own, we can emulate and style ourselves on……think – Madonna, Oprah, Annie Lennox, Dawn French, Tina Turner, Twiggy, Tziporah Salamon, Kylie Minogue, Joanna Lumley, Michelle Obama, Angela Bassett, Jennifer Anniston, Sophie Loren, Goldie Hawn and so on.
Why not keep magazine cut outs of baby boomer women you admire and create a mood board for inspiration and as part of your self-empowerment journey. Or if you prefer you can create a virtual version using Pinterest and pin images you find. Take a look at a couple of my Pinterest boards for ideas. I’ve added some links at the end of this blog post.
Suits you ma’m
Sod the size tags (cut them out of your clothing if it really bothers you). In keeping with your own unique personal fashion style, your aim should be to wear clothes that fit, compliment and accentuate your shape, skin and hair colouring. In Part 3 of this blueprint, I’ll be giving you some style tips to help you look great and feel fabulous in your 50’s and beyond.
Be grateful for what your body has done and can do for you. My stomach is patterned with stretch marks and you will never see me in a bikini, but I feel honoured that they are there as they serve to remind me that I was once a mother. You might moan about the ‘large hooter’ you inherited from your Greek grandmother, but did you know that the Grecian nose, which forms a straight line from base to tip, is considered by early 20th Century writer Harriet Hubbard Ayer, to be the perfect nose.
Do a lot of close up intricate needlework? I am sure you are grateful for the gift of sight – even if aided by good lighting and the wearing of a pair of multifocal spectacles.
In Part 2, I will be discussing positive affirmations, mindfulness and meditation.
In Part 3 I will share with you, some of my top style tips.
I look forward to hearing from you in the comments below.