Do you wake up in the morning feeling lethargic and uninspired as you realise that today will be pretty much a repeat of yesterday, the week before and in fact, the year before?
Are you struggling to find a sense of purpose or direction? Do you wish that you could do something exciting or make an impact someway, somewhere, somehow?
If so then it sounds very much to me like you have lost your ‘muchness’. Muchness is a term said to date from the 14th century and it was later widely attributed to Shakespeare. In Tim Burton’s film adaptation of Alice in Wonderland a now grown up Alice is told by the dormouse at The Mad Hatter’s tea party: “You’re not the same as you were before. You were much more….muchier. You’ve lost your muchness.”
The dormouse was trying to tell Alice that on her first visit down the rabbit hole as a young child she used to be so much more courageous, curious, imaginative and full of a zest for life. If like Alice, you too feel you have lost your muchness (your mojo, your joie de vivre), here are my 6 steps to help you get it back.
Feed your inner child
As we grow older we can get weighed down with responsibilities and being dutiful. Very often our daily life is spent doing what others want us to do – whether this is one’s boss, peers, parents, children or partner. Life then seems oh, so serious. Can you remember as a child what gave you joy? What made you laugh with abandoned glee? What games did you play or did you read, draw, dress up, collect things or bake cakes? Did you like to jump and make big splashes in puddles and climb trees? Do you still do any of these things? I bet not.
Next time you are in or near a park and see some swings, go on and have a go. If this is not possible due to where you live, or you are physically impaired or disabled, find an activity you can do such as watching your favourite childhood movie, or read/listen to childhood adventure classics. Creating collage art tags is one activity I enjoy doing. It involves getting lost within my imagination and shutting out the outside world, losing all sense of time, as I create a mess and dabble with paints, magazine cuttings, scraps of lace, etc, and glue things onto a canvas or card. And oh, I can’t tell you how many times I have watched The Wizard of Oz or Mary Poppins 🙂
Is your inner child crying out to be fed? Well, go feed her and don’t forget to hop, skip and jump down that yellow brick road! It really is so much easier to cope with the stresses of everyday life if you have a smile on your face and are feeling happier and more relaxed within yourself.
To thine own self be true
The beliefs and values you hold about the world around you and yourself, can really limit or liberate you. Take time to check-in and ask yourself whether these beliefs are your own or someone else’s. Where did they come from and how old are they. Are they the values and beliefs of yourself 15 or 20 years ago? Are they beliefs and values held by your parents, partner, or next door neighbour, which you’ve accepted and adopted but never questioned? When was the last time you personally did something you really wanted to do and not something that was expected of you by someone else? Check out my post ‘She Yearned to Be An Artist’. Time to be true to you, don’t you think?
Create ME time
Often we are so caught up with work demands and office politics, household chores or the nurturing of others that we can end up feeling constantly stressed out or tired. It is so important to have some time just for ourselves, whether this is to take a nice long, undisturbed relaxing and pampering bath every evening (instead of a rushed shower), or taking time out to go to a weekly knitting class. I and many other Life Coaches use a diagnostic tool called the Wheel of Life, to enable our clients to get a visual and graphical snapshot of the different areas of their lives as it is now, to enable them to assess what is off balance. If you would like to try this exercise, contact me and I will forward you a Wheel of Life worksheet with instructions that you can print out and complete for your own use.
“Freedom lies in being bold” ~ Robert Frost
Does this one sound scary? Start small! How about you wear something you wouldn’t normally wear – a tutu perhaps (yes go on, even if it is only indoors……and yes, I am going to get one too, I’ve wanted one for years!). You will be, I am sure, surprised by how liberating and free this small act will make you feel and hopefully it will spur you on to try something else bold, and then something else……..and yes, go on……something else……
Visualise and bloom
“I’d rather regret the things I’ve done, than the things I haven’t done”. ~ Lucille Ball
Always wanted to write a best selling novel? Or perhaps you’ve discovered that you are really quite good at baking and decorating cakes and friends and family commission you to make them for special occasions. You daydream about leaving your stressful non-fulfilling day job to set up a business making and selling them. What is stopping you? What steps do you need to take to achieve having your own business or writing and publishing your bestseller? Get yourself a notebook and brainstorm. Why not create a vision board to inspire and motivate you into taking action (see here for guidance).
Always wear a tiara
“Every woman who is a queen simply knew she could be one, and everyone else is still pretending she can’t”. ~ Marianne Williamson
Did you know that Saturday 24th May is International Tiara Day? It is a day for women to celebrate and embrace being empowered leaders in control of their own lives. You don’t have to wait ‘till then, you can make or buy one to wear now – you see, you are special and uniquely you – you are a queen. Lift up those drooping shoulders, hold your head up high, put on your tiara and boldly go reclaim your muchness!
I’d love to know what steps you have taken or are taking to reclaim your muchness, do leave a comment! And, do share this post with your friends on Facebook, Google+ or Twitter.